Hillary Clinton: The Herpes of Politics(Updated 2019 Edition!)

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Photo by AF Branco

Hey, have you heard the one about the Pantsuit Queen eyeballing another run in 2020? Not a joke, no punchline, this is politics in 2019. And if this is indeed the case(and who would be surprised, really), it has got to be the stupidest move in a very long streak of stupid moves made by the Democratic Party.

And, for the record, those of you thinking HRC is a political non-entity sitting at home knitting for the grandkids are just too adorbs. She is the Queen Bee of the DNC and is far too ego-oriented to withdraw quietly. Convincing yourself HRC is politically irrelevant may be comforting, but it’s not accurate.

At the very least, she’s in cahoots with the Gretchen Weiner to her Regina George, Elizabeth Warren. Apparently, Hillsy is schooling her acolyte on how to hand another term to the Orange Anal Wart while making it look easy.

No doubt she’d be Warren’s VP pick. And no doubt we’d see a repeat of 2016.

I mean, do those guys like losing elections? So many of their recent actions seem to bear this theory out that one has to wonder if humiliating failure is their desired endgame. It’s puzzling how they instruct us all to fear Trump while doing everything in their power to ensure he remains in office (until you realize most Democrats have much more in common with a rich turd like Trump than us.)

Has the Democratic Party completely repressed the results and repercussions of 2016? Sure seems that way. But, even if the DNC has, millions of Americans most assuredly have not.

In the past couple of years, Clinton has taken every opportunity to crow about her Super-PACs calling out Trump’s shenanigans. I suppose the irony of Super-PACs taking a stand against Trump’s war on the Little Guy is lost on someone who shells out 600 bucks for a haircut. But it’s nice to know Hillsy and her Super-PACs are part of the Resistance.

Comedy gold.

And watching Hillsy call anyone out for corruption is a textbook example of the pot calling the kettle black. One almost has to admire her endless supply of hubris.

And now she’s out shilling a book about “gutsy women” with her beastly kid. But I’m sure it’s just a coincidence and not a cynical ploy to remobilize the Pantsuit Brigade.


The only people who’d be delighted to see her run(aside from the aforementioned shrinking but Still Shrill for Hill Pantsuit Brigade) are the GOP and Donald Trump Jr., who has publicly encouraged her to do so. Junior is fully aware it would ensure Daddy another four years of fuckery, and four more years of Donnie Jr. being able to use the pick-up line, “Show me your oval office. My Dad’s the president.”

The scope of Hillary Clinton’s megalomania is without par in today’s political landscape. Trump comes close, but HRC actually does win the popular vote in this situation.

Just the fact she truly believes that anything she has to say beyond, “I’m leaving public life forever to live in a cave. Tell Bill his dinner’s in the fridge and his hooker’s in the guest room” will excite the majority of Americans is astounding.

Even though you couldn’t give two shits less Hills, your arrogance and sense of entitlement is the reason we have President Trump.

You. Your fault.

Not the millions of principled Americans who refused to vote for you.

As much as it pains your precious self and the mindless drones that support you (must … elect… vagina. But not Green Party vagina) there is one inescapable fact you can’t run from:

Trump didn’t win the 2016 election. You lost the 2016 election.

If America prefers a braindead conman over anything you have to offer, it’s time to re-evaluate your relevancy in today’s political climate and gracefully fade into the background. Forever. Please.

But you won’t, because you’re Hillary Clinton and believe every person on the planet should hang on every word that spews from your lie-hole.

You don’t care who or what you destroy in your quest for what you see as your birthright. You made that abundantly clear during the 2016 Democratic primaries when you thwarted the will of the people by cheating Bernie Sanders out of what was actually his right.

His right. Not yours.

But what of the DNC? Would they once again nominate a proven loser who’s at least as reviled as the Marmalade Moron?

Of course. How can they refuse? Clinton literally owns the Democratic Party. No hyperbole there. The DNC went broke getting Obama elected for a second term, but luckily a kindly benefactor stepped in to save the day.

Guess who?

So if the Howling Hag Bag wants the nomination, she will get it, and the Democrats will lose.

At the very least, the Party’s 2020 nominee will have the HRC seal of approval (in other words, another corporatist neoliberal), and the Democrats will lose. I’m looking at you, She Who Hedges Bets.

Then the whining and finger-pointing will begin anew since those pesky voters didn’t fall for the fear-mongering “Vote Blue No Matter Who” horseshit.

Because it can’t be something the establishment Democrats are doing wrong. Perish the thought. It’s those millions of American voters that won’t do their bidding.


Give us a Progressive presidential candidate, Dems. Give us Bernie Sanders, the most popular politician in the country by far.

Give us who the country needs and you will get our vote. Really.

Continue to care more about your corporate donors, including Hillary Clinton, and your already-flailing Party will be a dealt a death blow. It can’t survive another 2016.

Don’t say you weren’t warned. Again.

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is a political junkie and history buff randomly alternating between bouts of crankiness and amusement while bearing witness to the Apocalypse. Come along!

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