Lizzie’s Losing it in More Ways Than One: Warren WTF Moment # 245728

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Hope Bernie’s had his cootie vax. Photo by the Boston Globe

Hello, gentle reader.

Let’s just cut to the chase.

In case you've been vacationing on Saturn the past couple of days, the internet is inundated with tales of “leaked” volunteer scripts from Bernie’s campaign. It’s alleged that Warren and most of her constituency are educated and affluent (No way! I thought they all worked at Walmart!)

So what, right?

Here’s the rub: Warren’s camp purports that Bernie’s volunteers are instructed to drive this point home when talking to prospective voters. The story quickly began doing the rounds thanks to the usual pro-neolib news outlets, and within milliseconds Warren’s premeditated hissy fit was all over news feeds.

Bleeeeeeech.

So what to do?

Despite all her beer-swilling, Hula-dancing, and Ponds cold cream slathering, Warren is sinking like a stone going into Iowa.

But Liz has a plan for that!

  1. Nurture a persecution complex and start spouting groundless accusations.
  2. Warble how disappointed you are about the aforementioned (non)-event.
  3. And tie the whole gaslighting package up as a battle cry for unity, so everyone can marvel at your bravery in the face of such (non)-criticism.

Worked great for Hillary! (giggle)

Anyway, here’s Warren acting over-the-top maudlin. Be sure to bring tissues and your tiniest violins, peasants.

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Yeah, ooooooooooo-k.

The whole set-up is so nauseatingly transparent that it insults our collective intelligence.

Not surprisingly, the only people buying into it are establishment Dems who have long since lost most of their frontal lobes to terminal partisanship. They will overlook or justify whatever’s necessary to get Blue Vag in the White House, honesty and integrity be damned.

Blue Vag or Bust!!!!!

Anyway

C’mon people. ANYONE can post and screenshot dumb fuckery on a candidate’s Slack and then start screaming foul. ANYONE.

The most mind-fucking part of this sad shit show is Lizzie, the Harvard Professor, vehemently denying she’s educated and/or affluent. No, seriously, she really does. She asserts she “doesn’t recognize” either herself or her Birkin bag-clutching followers from that description. They are a grassroots campaign dammit!

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Oh, dear god. Photo by Legal Insurrection

You just can’t make this shit up. But Warren sure can.

Talk about shooting yourself in the foot.

Oh, and Lizzie? Get a grip. You are affluent and educated, as are most of your followers. Why are you denying it? They are Ladies Who Brunch and Dudes Who Wear Suits Every Day. Together, you are the New and Improved Pantsuit Brigade 2.0. This is a simple fact, just like your abysmal senatorial voting record and campaign donor list.

Besides, anyone campaigning for Bernie (or any of his followers)is fully aware of Bernie’s policy regarding the badmouthing of other candidates. He unequivocally denounces it, and all of Bernie’s volunteer scripts make his position quite clear.

To be honest, I really wish Bernie would stop referring to scumbuckets like Warren and Biden as his “friends.” Bernie, you have a sweet soul, but neither of these self-serving snakes deserves your friendship or protection. They would not, and will not, do the same for you.

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She let a perfect opportunity to box that bitch’s ears just pass her by. Photo by the New Republic

Warren’s the kid who cries to mom about how mean her sibling is behaving just because he’s kicking her whiny ass at checkers.

So Lizzie’s out there, systematically milking the grave(and imaginary) injustices perpetrated against her for fundraising purposes. This jejune bit of political theater at Bernie’s expense sounded the death knell for Warren’s already floundering campaign.

I may never smile again.

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OK, maybe I will. Photo by Vanteezy

I’m not even going to dignify Lizzie’s claim about a (fictional)conversation she had with Sanders in 2018 with a serious rebuttal. So here’s the gist: Bernie told her in super-secrecy a woman candidate couldn’t win the 2020 Presidential race.

According to Lizzie, there were no witnesses to this alleged exchange, making it her word against his.

How convenient is that?

What in the actual fuck does this pathological liar think she has to gain by slandering Bernie? How stupid is this silly woman to assert Bernie is anti-woman in any way? Has she been drinking the same water as JoeBiden?

Sanders can point to a half-century of actions backing up his consistently honorable intentions. He would never state a woman couldn’t achieve the presidency. It’s about as likely as Bernie or Busters espousing Vote Blue No Matter Who.

Ain’t happening. End of.

Lizzie needs to make her stories at least semi-plausible if she really wants to stir the shit pot. For someone who lies all day every day, she's pretty damn sucky at it. As her gal pal Hillary found out in 2016, no-one likes a liar or a cheat. Her little stunt cost her any tiny shred of credibility she has left.

Elizabeth Warren has committed political suicide. In lieu of flowers, please send a wooden stake, shit tons of garlic, and Medicare for All.

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No? Fuck. Photo by ITOW Report

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is a political junkie and history buff randomly alternating between bouts of crankiness and amusement while bearing witness to the Apocalypse. Come along!

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