No, Progressives are Not Gravitating to Biden and Other Myths from the 2020 Shit Fest We Call an “Election”

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Do you prefer the Red Rapist or the other Red Rapist? Photo by USA Today

So much neoliberal wishful thinking bullshit, so little time. Let’s break down some of this happy horseshit piece by piece, shall we?

Biden’s Sudden Appeal to Progressives:

Yeah, there isn’t any, no matter what the media tells you. That’s a big zero, zip, zilch. Remember, these are the same people who assured you that we Progressives had been put in our place and would turn out in droves for the Pantsuit Succubus. You may recall we did not. This is what happens when you allow yourselves to be lulled by blatant MSM propaganda.

Fauxgressives, on the other hand, will do exactly as they are told, considering they are DNC drones who actually believe Bernie Sanders is a leftist. They simply don’t, and won’t, understand that Bernie was a compromise candidate for the Left and that without the Indy vote, they haven’t got a prayer. Again.

Here’s the thing. People are more pissed off four years later, not less. The only cowards caving and supporting the Blue Rapist already had a D for Dumbass behind their name anyway. Simple math shows a Gropey Joe path to victory as an impossibility.

We’re Not Trump!

I hate to break it to you Democrats, but you actually are. There is no discernable difference between Trump and Biden’s platforms or political philosophy. Blue or red, the American people are denied healthcare as a right, economic justice, and racial equality. The only ones benefiting from either administration are the elites responsible for turning the U.S. into a modern-day feudal state.

“Orange Man Bad” is not a platform. But it is kinda fun watching the Democratic Party using the same losing playbook they tanked with in 2016.

The denial of Obama opening the legal door to Trump’s fuckery is the single biggest delusion responsible for all the Biden Love. Outraged by the police state, malignant disregard for your rights, and unceasing abuse of the environment? Thank Mister No Hope and No Change.

Neither party gives a single, solitary fuck about you aside from your economic usefulness to our corporate overlords. Stop trying to convince yourself otherwise.

Better Chance than Hillary

Seriously, way to set the bar low guys.

You’ve actually chosen a candidate that makes the Pantsuit Succubus look competent by comparison. You’re exploiting an elderly man clearly on a greased slide of cognitive decline because you’re banking on his Obama connection to pile up those neoliberal votes.

Maybe he will, who knows. Still won’t make any difference, as 75% of the country are not registered Democrats, and 50% of those are Independents. Once again, your failure to accept basic math facts will secure your defeat, although you’ll blame everyone from Putin to Sanders for your asshattery.

Dragging the Dems Left

This is entirely hilarious.

“We’ll get Biden in the White House and hold his feet to the fire!”

Oh, do tell. Biden has assured his Wall Street donors that nothing would fundamentally change under his watch. He will take your pain and suffering and wrap it up in pretty neoliberal paper to make it palatable to the Hot Yoga and Brunch Brigade. Your slide into the gutter, or worse, will continue unabated with a Biden administration. Joe’s loyalty lies with the 500 or so billionaires he’s stated aren’t the problem, not with you.

In any case, you’ve got it ass-backwards. The appropriate time to hold someone’s feet to the fire is before an election, not after. It’s called vetting, kids. And anyone who looks at Biden’s forty years of rightwing policy-making and deduces that he can be pulled left is either sniffing glue, suffering from Stockholm Syndrome, or both.

The DNC is making the exact same tactical errors they made in 2016, from primary rigging, to Red Scare II, and picking the absolute worst candidate for this moment in history. But, the truth is, the Democrats still win even if they “lose.” Their stock portfolios are safe either way. Your well-being isn’t even on their radar.

So, when your Blue Rapist loses to the Red Rapist, keep your vote-shaming bullshit to yourselves. Hating Trump doesn’t automatically mean we like you.

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is a political junkie and history buff randomly alternating between bouts of crankiness and amusement while bearing witness to the Apocalypse. Come along!

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