PinnedMember-onlyThe Ten Saddest Songs in the Whole Damn WorldGrab your hanky, fainting couch, and unhealthy coping mechanisms Step right up, step right up! If you’ve been the victim of unrequited or lost love, you may be entitled to compensation. What sort of compensation, you ask? These songs. These songs are your compensation. From every genre and every era…Music7 min readMusic7 min read
Published inFanfare·PinnedMember-onlyShit From Five Christmas Shows That Would Never Fly TodayQuick! Someone call CPS! — I was watching Rudolph with my nine-year-old grandson the other day. He didn’t get why Rudolph’s mom and girlfriend weren’t allowed to join in the search for Rudolph after he snapped from relentless assholery and bolted. He had no concept of what Donner meant by “man’s work.” I must be…Humor5 min readHumor5 min read
Published inRock n’ Heavy·PinnedMember-onlyFive Probably Best Forgotten Seventies Love SongsI apologize in advance — Heavy on the cheese, please. Yeah, these songs have probably been forgotten for a reason. Yikes. But I’m gonna bring this shit back, wearing a stick pin in my cowl neck sweater and reeking of Love’s Baby Soft. Because I love you guys and want you to share my Engelbert…Music5 min readMusic5 min read
PinnedMember-onlyThe Catholic Girls Start Much Too LateDenim leads to the road of prostitution — Well, they showed you a statue, told you to pray They built you a temple and locked you away Aw, but they never told you the price that you pay For things that you might have done Only the good die young Two images spring to mind when most…Humor5 min readHumor5 min read
21 hours agoMember-onlyTen Things That Lived in My 70s Summer BackyardPull up a ridiculously uncomfortable lawn chair and sweat a spell — Being a kid in the 1970s was nothing short of perfection. Bands of unsupervised kids roamed the streets on their bikes from dawn to dusk. The grownups didn’t care where we went as long as we were out of their way. Darwin took care of the rest. When I contrast…Humor5 min readHumor5 min read
2 days agoMember-onlyHappy Birth Year to MeTwenty, count ‘em, twenty groovy jams from 1965 — 1965 was a damn fine year to arrive on the planet. 1965’s musical cornucopia is an embarrassment of riches, so naturally that’s when I chose to enter this vale of tears. I’d even opine that 1965 was the height of the 1960s’ musical brilliance and innovation. Because if I have…Music6 min readMusic6 min read
5 days agoMember-onlyAll That Glitters: Joe Kennedy and Gloria SwansonThe mogul, the missus, the movie star, and the marquis — Long before Jack Kennedy and Marilyn Monroe were dancing in the sheets, there was Joe Kennedy Sr. and silent screen superstar Gloria Swanson. The movie star and the mogul quickly cultivated a relationship, both professional and personal, that would change the course of their lives and careers, and not necessarily…Movies5 min readMovies5 min read
Jun 1Member-onlyFive Bad Songs By Great BandsThe agony and the … well, just more agony, actually — They say ya can’t win ‘em all. That’s a mathematical certainty even for wildly successful bands. Every now and then even the greats become the Sultans of Suck, if for no other reason than to keep those full-of-themselves rockstars humble. The Universe knows what it’s doing. So, without further ado…Music3 min readMusic3 min read
May 26Member-onlyDebunking Five More Rock and Roll MythsGrab your urban legend detector — There are so many stories from Planet Rock that everyone blindly accepts as factual. This, of course, does not make it so. Many of the most enduring rock and roll legends have little, if any, basis in reality. But when has a reality bitchslap ever stopped the spread of malicious…Music4 min readMusic4 min read
May 21Member-onlyThe Very Best of MTV’s UnpluggedEight unforgettable performances from Music Television’s Golden Age — When MTV’s acoustic performance series “Unplugged” debuted in 1989, it ignited, and reignited, many a music career. This scaled-back, less-is-more challenge was embraced by many established artists in the 90s as a way to breathe new life into their work. It also captured for posterity newer bands like Pearl Jam…Music5 min readMusic5 min read
